just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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