I just pynch a tree in the face
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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