Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
