if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize