he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
