ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
sex in a hospital.. check
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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