Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
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Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
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I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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