Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
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