the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
