i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Randomize
