so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
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