I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize