# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
