My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
29 People Who Do Dirty Things Just To Get Their Way
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....