I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
i think i just lost a toe
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize