remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Randomize
