Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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