just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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