Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Randomize
