i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
