just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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