We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
