she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
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