Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Randomize