And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
whose parrot is this?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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