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• (718): View more from New York

  what happened last night?

  (917): View more from New York City

  u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style

  (718): View more from New York

  that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party

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• (308): View more from Nebraska

  i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .

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• 

  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT

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• (209): View more from California

  Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!

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• (254): View more from Texas

  you are never too drunk for berry picking

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• 

  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often

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• (587): View more from Alberta

  So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?

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• (817): View more from Texas

  When was the last time you wore pants?

  (214): View more from Texas

  Time is relative.

  (214): View more from Texas

  And pants are optional.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack

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