Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
