sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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