he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
