and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
he was CRYING into my vagina
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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