think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
