He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize