Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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