have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
