; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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