I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
should my penis look like a turkey
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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