My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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