I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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