Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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