drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
