DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
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