# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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