I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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