How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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