just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
my poor anus
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize