Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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