Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
