Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
