Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
only you would photoshop your dick
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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