i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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