I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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