Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
